Tuesday, March 29, 2011

communal prayer

i have to say that i am really enjoying
the morning prayer service
that we have begun at our church
on wednesdays during lent

only 4-5 people typically show up
but it feels like commmunity nonetheless
we sit facing each other in the choir stalls
and alternate verses of the psalms

for an introvert like me
this coming together
to begin the day with prayer
provides a stronger sense of connection
than the "fellowship lunches"
we have in the church basement

i find that in my solitary morning prayer
during the rest of the week
i hear in my mind the voice of the woman
who sits beside me wednesday mornings
and then on the alternate verses
i hear the voices of those who normally sit facing me

it makes my solitary prayer
not so solitary

5 comments:

  1. thanks pilgrim
    for this insight into
    communal prayer
    we here at communitas dies
    applaud and extol you
    to persist in your lenten burden
    lifting is always easier with
    two or more people

    chant did i hear chant
    some one might want me to chant
    to teach some people to chant

    i'd do anything i could
    to keep communal prayer rich and vital
    anywhere in the world

    it's a mark of my vocation
    my invocation
    my propesity to
    wel um hnmh well ah
    yeah well
    tadatadatatatatdat data
    chanta a little chant pour moi

    sounds of the country

    peace

    jh

    ReplyDelete
  2. well
    speaking of lenten burdens
    there was a cross today
    consisting of traffic
    awful stop-and-go traffic
    on my way home from pasadena this afternoon
    it took me over an hour and a half
    to get from pasadena to ikea
    (i often stop at ikea
    on the way home from pasadena these days
    there's always one more thing
    that i need from there
    for the new house)

    except that today there were
    three things that i needed
    (1) some replacement pegs for
    our bookcases that got lost in the move
    (2) some linseed oil for the wood countertop on the kitchen island
    (3) a small table for our walk-in closet

    well i was already frustrated
    by the time i got there
    because of the traffic
    and it was getting late
    and i was getting hungry

    first the book case pegs
    (well, first AFTER the obligatory stop
    at the "as is" section)

    the first salesperson told me
    "yeah we have those somewhere
    check with the bookcases themselves
    or in the home organization section
    of the market place"
    i had been hoping for help that was
    a little more specific than that
    the salesperson saw my disappointment
    with his answer and quickly added
    "there should be someone there to help you"

    so i wandered around looking for the
    warehouse aisle that had the book cases
    found a sales person and was told:
    "we don't sell those separately
    you'll have to go to customer service"
    and upon making my way to that department
    i was told that they
    didn't have any in stock
    and would have to order them

    so then i set off in search of item #2
    the linseed oil
    i asked another salesperson on the warehouse floor
    and was told that it was "probably"
    upstairs in the kitchen section
    so i headed up there
    wound my way through living rooms
    to kitchens
    waited for the salesperson to finish
    helping another customer
    she then looked it up in the computer for me
    "aisle 18, bin 80" she said
    so back downstairs
    by now i know my way around well enough
    to skip the labyrinth of the market place
    and head directly to the warehouse area

    ok there's aisle 18
    here's bin 1, 2, 3 ...
    bin 80 must be a long way down
    all the way at the very very end
    of the long long aisle
    (well at least i'm getting
    some exercise, i said to console myself)
    finally arrived at bin 80
    no linseed oil
    just some black stain
    not what i needed

    all the way back up
    the long long aisle
    look for a salesperson
    who checked the computer for me
    and confirmed that aisle 18, bin 80
    was the correct location
    of course he had to walk all the way
    back down to bin 80
    to see if maybe it really was there
    and i had missed it
    so i walked with him
    all the way down
    and all the way back

    he decides to call
    up to the kitchen department
    no answer

    he gets another warehouse person to help
    who then also has to walk all the way
    down to bin 80 to see for himself
    after he returns he tells me to wait there
    while he checks on something
    and wanders off

    ReplyDelete
  3. ... continuing

    i decide to go in search of
    the third item on my list
    while i am waiting for him to return

    i find it easily enough
    though of course it is heavy
    and is up on a shelf that is
    just barely within my reach
    i call out to a salesperson
    who is walking nearby
    he doesn't hear me
    so i huff and puff
    and stand on tip toe
    and wriggle the box back and forth
    until it is far enough out
    that i can sort of get a grip on it
    and then i pull some more
    until is starts to slide down
    toward me and i catch it and
    ease it down onto the floor

    meanwhile the salesman who
    hadn't heard me call for help
    comes back and sees me and says
    "that was the most awkward
    thing i've ever seen"

    "gee thanks" i said
    turning and wheeling my cart away

    i head back to where the other salesperson
    had left me to go in search of linseed oil
    and sit down on the box in my cart
    completely spent
    trying to get a handle
    on my growing frustration

    "these are my kids"
    i hear jesus say
    when i start to think
    uncharitable thoughts toward
    the salespeople
    (ok, i'll admit that i wasn't just
    "starting" to think uncharitable thoughts
    they were getting pretty full blown by now)

    "i know, i know" i concede
    and my heart opens just a little
    toward them
    and i think about you
    smiling at the cell phone
    salesperson
    or was it the computer/internet contract
    that was so oppressive?
    any way
    i think
    maybe i could actually
    give a genuine smile
    to these high school or college kids
    who are working here

    but by the time the guy returns
    with the news that they simply
    don't have any linseed oil
    and the computer which says they have
    13 bottles of it is just plain wrong
    that window of opening in my heart has shut
    and i grumble something about
    having driven an hour and a half
    to get there

    and i am terse with the person
    at the check-counter
    who remembers me asking about
    the book-shelf pegs 45 minutes earlier
    and politely asks me if i found
    everything i needed
    "no" i growl and walk away

    after managing to flop
    the box containing the table
    into the back of the car
    i notice the cross hanging from neck
    in plain sight and think
    "gee lord, i guess i wasn't
    a very good example of a christian tonight"

    jesus smiles

    and then i remember
    that he himself
    cursed a fig tree
    when he was tired and hungry
    so i knew that he understood
    what it was like for me
    and that was kind of cool
    and helped me to not feel so bad about it

    ReplyDelete
  4. i thought i had stated something pretty clever to all this
    something jesus might've said
    ah well
    at least you understand that chirst is a sort of comedian
    he couldn't help himself
    cajoling joking
    sursing trees
    what a card

    ReplyDelete
  5. cursing trees
    it's late
    i should be asleep

    ReplyDelete